present

We are always living for the future, hoping for something more than today. We look to each other to search for something to be revealed, only to find that we all are only given today. Nobody holds the secret or the key to more joy. No relationship is going to fill you up. You can experience the joy of friendship and romance, but what happens when all you do is wait for that phone call from someone or wait to hang out with people. What happens along the way? Life is waiting for you to live, but you are waiting to live while life is already there. We believe that we can find happiness in other people. We believe we can find happiness in a career or in artificial paradises that we create to live in, when the real world is still here dragging you along.

I struggle with this terribly. I want to fall in love. I want a man to sweep me off my feet, teach me about love, and to bring me to where life is. Yet, while I live in these fantasy worlds, I am missing out on today. When all I do is wait for someone to reply or someone to call me to hang out, I am missing out on right now. Yes, there is such thing as patience. But I do not think patience means ignoring the present. I think it takes more patience to live out the present than to live in the future. I am not going to live by being fed through phone calls, the presence of others, waiting to be done with work, or other things. I want to live in the present, to its fullest, and to find my joy in Christ in the now, not when I get married. I am going to find the truth of the present, for the present is my future.

This was not part of the original post...

I want to make note what God just showed me in 1 Timothy:

^4:1But the Spirit saith expressly, that in later times some shall fall away from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits and doctrines of demons, ^4:2through the hypocrisy of men that speak lies, branded in their own conscience as with a hot iron; ^4:3forbidding to marry, and commanding to abstain from meats, which God created to be received with thanksgiving by them that believe and know the truth. ^4:4For every creature of God is good, and nothing is to be rejected, if it be received with thanksgiving: ^4:5for it is sanctified through the word of God and prayer. ^4:6If thou put the brethren in mind of these things, thou shalt be a good minister of Christ Jesus, nourished in the words of the faith, and of the good doctrine which thou hast followed until now: ^4:7but refuse profane and old wives' fables. And exercise thyself unto godliness: ^4:8for bodily exercise is profitable for a little; but godliness is profitable for all things, having promise of the life which now is, and of that which is to come. 

Godliness has profit for now.

God has made all things right if we bathe it in prayer and thanksgiving.

The idea of marriage being forbidden is a lie, despite 1 Corinthians saying it is better not to be married, for "nothing is to be rejected". If God gives us marriage we are to accept it with thanksgiving.

I am being taught to allow God to give me His blessings, because lately it has been hard to believe God would want to bless me but that is a fault of pride and ignorance toward God's forgiveness and goodness.