choosing my major..

The one thing that touches me is when the human race can come together in relation. I think suffering is a friend to this connection, for it is in suffering that we relate in our deepest feelings and feel a need for each other's care. I wish I could come to Moody and be taught about how to love, about how to develop relationships, but there is not a major labeled "love". Must I go into "Compassion" to know how to love? Or what about "Theology" to know the Author of Love? Does the major in communication help me to love? Does the major of youth ministry help me to love? All of these major help us to relate, even more if we are called to a specific area like writing for a magazine. Personally, all I know that I desire is to connect with the people around me in their sorrows and their joys. Maybe I should go into counseling? But who am I to counsel? I deal with negative thoughts aggressively every day. I can not listen to people's complaints on life when I can not even deal with my own. People in counseling have a lot of patient. Maybe all I am called to do is to understand, to open my eyes and have ears to hear the truth of God. Maybe I should go into theology. I am not going to be Pastor, of course. I don't even know if I like the idea of working in a church. I do know that I have a passion for the lost because I was once there and at many times I feel like I am there once again. The only truth in my life that brings me joy, not happiness but JOY, is knowing and trusting that God is pursuing to love me. I want to go into theology, not to debate but to know more who this God is. Why does God love me, and how does He love me? How does He love the lost? How can I have a heart like God? What are the qualities of God? How is it that God can say, "My heart is changed within me; all my compassion is aroused." (Hosea 11:8b)? I thought that God was just Creator and Sustainer, but what happens when you see the emotional side of God? A God of compassion? What does that really mean? And what is God's word telling us? What is this revelation to us? and how do we interpret it? Honestly, I have no idea what to pursue at Moody. I have no idea what my goal is in life or what people group I want to minister to. I have no idea if I want to go into advertisement, business, or ministry in the church. All I know is that I want to know God better and to love Him with all my heart, soul and mind, and then to outflow a love like His to the people around me as well as myself. What else is worth living for than this?